A few days ago, Bonnaroo Music & Arts Festival announced their 2010 lineup in a grand fiasco of a kludge, forcing fans through their resource-heavy, headache-inducing Myspace page. (Not sure who paid who for that one.) To make matters worse, someone at Bonnaroo HQ had the grand idea to roll out the names of the performers a few at a time from morning to night, holding back some of the big names such as Kings of Leon until the end. I suspect they were trying to build anticipation and encourage people to check back. All it did for me was annoy the piss out of me and force me draw conclusions prematurely, prompting my Twitter posts such as, “Bonnaroo lineup is blah.” It doesn’t take a genius to realize that if you announce all the bands in one big, clean press-release, people will overlook the bad and free-promote the good. Had they been on the list when I looked, my Twitter might have read, “Tori Amos and TMBG play Bonnaroo! Yay!” Instead, I had to cope with names like Dave Mathews Band and Hall & Oates minus Oates.
Seriously, Dave Matthews? Kings of Leon? Has Bonnaroo become a festival for bland, homogenized, stiff-neck, radio rock? Sure, sure, granted, the rest of the schedule isn’t all that bad, but there also aren’t any once-in-a-lifetime, must-see, slam-dunk acts this year. Like Pavement for instance. Pavement will be playing a scant-few shows for the first time in over 10 years. Coachella booked them. Pitchfork booked them. Bonnaroo? Insert crickets chirping.
For the record, I would like to see Tori Amos, They Might Be Giants, Dan Deacon, She & Him, and Regina Spektor; but I’ve already seen three out of those five, and I’ll be seeing They Might Be Giants at the Exit/In next month (with Jonathan Coulton opening to boot!). And, yes, it would be nice to see some of the greats, such as Stevie Wonder, Jimmy Cliff, John Prine, and Kris Kristofferson; but not nice enough for me to endure three days of heat, odors, and annoying people.
So what bands would make me change my mind? Any three of the following:
The Breeders, Elvis Costello, Sam Phillips, Coner Oberst, Maria Taylor, Lucinda Williams, Emily Haines, Joanna Newsom, Flight of the Conchords, Boredoms, Jesca Hoop, Shearwater, M.I.A.
Or any two of the following:
Okkervil River, Blonde Redhead, Frank Black in any manifestation, Iris Dement, Iggy Pop, Jolie Holland, Dolores Keene, Evan Parker, William Parker, Ornette Coleman, Solex, Ween
Or just one of these:
Tom Waits, Leonard Cohen, Anthony Braxton, The Sun Ra Arkestra (yes, they’re still playing, sans Sun Ra), Negativland, The Residents, Cecil Taylor, Ghostface Killah & Raekwon duo, Ken Nordine, and last but not least, the brilliant Finnish sound-art band Kuupuu.
Are you listening Bonnaroo?
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P.S. For those of you who don’t want to suffer through the Bonnaroo Myspace, here is the 2010 schedule:
Dave Matthews Band
Kings of Leon
Stevie Wonder
Jay-Z
Tenacious D
Weezer
The Flaming Lips with Stardeath and White Dwarfs perform “Dark Side of the Moon”
The Dead Weather
Damian Marley & Nas
Phoenix
Norah Jones
Michael Franti & Spearhead
John Fogerty
Regina Spektor
Jimmy Cliff
LCD Soundsystem
The Avett Brothers
Thievery Corporation
Rise Against
Tori Amos
The National
Zac Brown Band
Les Claypool
John Prine
The Black Keys
Steve Martin & the Steep Canyon Rangers
Jeff Beck
Dropkick Murphys
She & Him
Against Me!
The Disco Biscuits
Daryl Hall & Chromeo
Jamey Johnson
Clutch
Bassnectar
Kid Cudi
Baaba Maal
Kris Kristofferson
Medeski Martin & Wood
The xx
GWAR
Dan Deacon Ensemble
Tinariwen
Wale
Deadmau5
The Melvins
Gaslight Anthem
Miike Snow
Nitty Gritty Dirt Band
Dr. Dog
They Might Be Giants
Punch Brothers
Isis
Blitzen Trapper
Blues Traveler
Miranda Lambert
Calexico
OK Go
Trombone Shorty & Orleans Avenue
Martin Sexton
Lotus
Baroness
Dave Rawlings Machine
Mayer Hawthorne and the County
Japandroids
Jay Electronica
Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros
Ingrid Michaelson
The Dodos
Manchester Orchestra
The Temper Trap
Cross Canadian Ragweed
Big Sam’s Funky Nation
Carolina Chocolate Drops
Tokyo Police Club
The Entrance Band
Local Natives
Brandi Carlile
Mumford & Sons
Rebelution
Diane Birch
Monte Montgomery
Julia Nunes
The Postelles
Lucero
Here We Go Magic
Hot Rize
Neon Indian
B.O.B
Needtobreathe
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